Bye White Isle

This is the last Drivel. Sad times. We have news. We are home.

It is too druggy and violent for us in Ibiza!! Too many nights of going out watching boys/ girls getting beaten up took its toll. It all just hit home that enough is enough. We were bored. I think the ’sex bed’ on the ‘ket balcony’ was a bit much for us or when George had to call an Ambulance for a 15 year old girl who had OD on cocaine it was the icing on the cake. I could list more and go on but I think you get the general idea. We’re treating the entire Ibiza madness as an experience, not all bad! We had such a good first couple of weeks but we soon realised it was home time. We are not home sick girls (as a year in Florida would prove) but out there we really were, we had no money and no desire to sell tickets to chavs (chav is a compliment for the knobs that were there) all day long. It would be wicked for a holiday & I would go with a crowd for a week but for two more months was making us so depressed. On the second to last night we actually got caught in the middle of a fight with bouncers and a scouser boy, they literally kicked his head in with no regard for him or anyone around. The police turned up checked he was still breathing, then carried on walking. That was the final staw. We don´t need this alcohol abuse anymore… we did it for four years at uni!! I think the two of us had to have closure on the experience though, otherwise it would have always been in the back of our mind that we should have done a summer season somewhere after uni. So that’s the news, I’ve decided I’m going to re decorate my room and I’m looking for a job…just to tie me over, save some money… planning my next trip (Liz!!). My life is just one rollocoster of excitement! George is resting/recovering (OAP) before becoming a IBM city girl in October. So we are home now so we can start on road trips. We would have let you know sooner but we had to make some surprise visits to Essex, Wales, Reading and Pompey!!

Ibizzla 3

Update 3 from Nuts. Our memories are a big blur but here goes.

The other night we ended up talking to 5 Dads from Nottingham, who decided to make bets on us. They had these poker tokens and were betting on stuff like how many brothers we had, star signs, birthdays etc. The loser had to get a tattoo – haha gutted!
The other day this tiny little blonde boy befriended us in the sea. He had no arm bands on and was flicking water at us. We were hungover and ratty but immediately took it upon ourselves to make sure he didn´t drown. We asked him what his name was and who was looking after him, he said I´m Joshy my babysitter is Jessica. So after a long 20mins of playing with a half drowning 3 year old some old man comes along, his Dad and shouts Spanish at him and takes him off into a restaurant – what the hell! Turns out that we think his one liner was learnt in an English lesson or something, little git.
Another night we were in a hell hole club in the West End, v.drunk and some guy tried to talk to me. Before I knew it I was screaming “Do you want me to smack you?” Molly looked him straight in the eyes and said “She will smack you”. That was the end of him. The next day on the beach I looked at Molly asking whether that really happened and in our hungover state she just replied “you have a screwed up rat face”. We howled with laughter.
A different night some girl was bugging these boys and she picked up two drinks, one in each hand, stropped off with her skirt all ruffled up around her waist with her green knickers on show to the world – CLASSY.
Last night we´d had enough, got a 4euro chinese takeaway pot and stagged off to the Ibiza sunset rocks. We looked up, the world was spinning. But the moon was so bright it was our only light! The sea was jet black and the stars were… covered by clouds. But still, it was a surreal moment.
Drunk memoirs over.

We hate our jobs, trying to take money from chavs is NOT fun anymore. Our apartment sucks, it is a sweatbox and we live with idiots. Our bodies cannot handle anymore pulp from the orange juice in the cocktails, seriously gross. And we are scrounging for euros. And the drug scene is totally ridiculous.

However, we have boat parties, pool parties and bbqs all in the pipeline so things can only get better!

And so the story goes..

So here is another update – it will be written by me, so I can assure you won´t be half as long as the other as George has all the writing skills.

We are in an internet cafe right next to our apartment, we´ve only discovered it this evening (it´s tiny, 2euro for one hour).

So I´m not to sure where we left off but I´ll just start from Friday – it is Radio 1´s big weekend out here. We weren´t too sure what was going on, but we knew we had to go as everyone was talking about it. We were stopped on the beach by a lady asking “can I ask you both some questions about this weekend” we obviously said “yeah sure” out of know where she pulls out a microphone and head phones and another women with a sound microphone. I literally was speachless and shite, however George was in her element!! The questions were “What´s going on this weekend and Where is there to behave and rave?” I don´t know if any of you heard as it was aired on Friday But George started going on about “Sun, Sea, Sand with A&E, no where to behave” blah blah just a really good speil, she has a talent for radio speaking!!

So we moved into our new apartment and the girls we are living with gave us the low down on the radio one weekend. It was at Ibiza Rocks hotel and Vernon Kay was presenting, Annie Mac was playing Akon and others but we had been drinking too many ciders to notice – we spent most of our time in the pool it was right by the stage!! We both have a new found love for Vernon Kay he was really funny. It was so much fun but as we were drinking in the day our hangovers kicked in too soon and we were done so went home for a nap, woke up about midnight starving went to a chinese (I think we were still drunk?!) then joined the Vom club again. Woke up 4pm on Sat. Hanging. Not fun.

We´ve lost track of the days as they all merge into one. The other night we went out for a ´quiet´ one just to the westend (it reminds me of a massive Guildhall, like a bar strip but in blocks like New York). Ended up bargining with a PR guy to let us have free shots then met two guys from Liverpool uni Callum and Liam – completely on our wave length and Callum said he wanted to go on the sling shot bungey ball, but Liam was too scared and I was like I want to go on that but George is too scared soooo he ended up paying for us to go on!! Reeeeesult. 50 euros, poor sod. We´ll never see them again. Anyway it was brilliant I loved it and I´m just waiting for the next Callum so I can get a free go again!!! That night we ended up paying 7euros for the entire night?!

Last night we managed to get our workers wrist bands, which get us cheaper drinks. errrrrm and today we´ve spent all day on the beach. Claire we´ve found an 70´s 80´s and 90´s club which I don´t think you´ll leave once you walk in. We walked in and George said “music with words, I´m happy!” and I said “They´re playing Grease, I´m happy!”

Part One – IBIZA!

2 Girls, 2 flights, San Antonio and a lot of courage

 

We are currently sitting in a bar scavaging free internet, haven’t even bought a water.. we are hiding!! So obviously you know we are here safe and sound..only just! We’ll start from the beginning but if you get bored skip to the end, this is mainly for Claire who has demanded every detail. Sunday (By Molly) – All went wrong, we missed the train to get us to the airport. After repacking our bag three times by the check in desk because they were over weight we got delayed in customs because Les had very kindly given me a bag of presents for my bday and with the repacking at the check in desk i just put them in my hand luggage and low and behold it was everything you cant take through customs, so I was searched. Made it through 7 mins before boarding!! Choked on a MacDonalds saw the skinny Samanda twins from BB who were on our flight and crammed in the departure lounge. I don’t know how but when walking up the steps to the plane I had my boarding pass and by the time i got to the top i had lost it! so i was last on the plane emptying my bag everywhere trying to find it hearing George shouting down the plane ”I hate you. Why do you do this to me? Why are you even coming?” everyone was laughing. It was a scene. Arrived in Ibiza!! YAY. Christopher B (the bloke ‘apparently’ picking us up) didn’t show, so we went to the taxi rank. It was a riot. At least 200 people waiting all shouting in Spanish me and George laughing as we were in no rush. A woman who had pushed in front of us starting shouting at us saying we had pushed in.. we were not happy by this point I got my finger out telling her off, she then rang someone who came to pick her up as we heard her say she was traumatised and terrorised. We ended up queuing for about an hour and ended up getting a cab with a nice English lady who was visiting her daughter out here. Arrived at Hostel (which is more like a hotel) made friends with Pappa (who we have named) then unpacked. Decided as we were in Ibiza we had to go out, so at 3am we did had shots for Claire discovered 5 cocktails for 5 euro. Everything is right on our door step we love it. In the heart of the West End could not be any better. (It’s George, Molly is bored of typing). A man stroked Molly’s hair and I screamed get your swine hands off her. Met Aussie guys and rioted in Capones. It was brilliant, this chavy strip of bars was everything we expected it to be, totally mad. Monday (Still George) – Went to Ship Inn where there is a notice board full of adverts for housemates and jobs. The coke had oil on it, it was a standard pub hole. But informative because we landed our first job. Roy met us, threw some ‘Guestlist’ Magasines at us and told us to sell them on the beach for 10 euro and we keep 4 euro. We said, start Weds. Looked around dog kennels, met some wicked nutcases; strippers and dancers who loved their apartments but we simply did not. We met Kelly Coke (we named her) who showed us her drug den. We were quite disheartened after a hot first day in San Antonio and still no where to stay. So, we decided to get smashed in the West End and some bars around the bay. Messed about with some fresher girls and got talking to an absolutely crazy worker who wanted us to live in her apartment above one of the clubs. There we were at 3.30am agreeing to live in her hole and hugging our new roomie bellowing our delight to all passers by. KFC, Vomclub in the bed, passed out. Tuesday (George) – We stirred and completely freaked at what we had agreed to. I was fit for NOTHING all day. Molly led me around more dog kennels. We even got the wrong boat to the wrong bay to see a flat. We did not speak the whole way. Saw the place, met a wicked gay dancer who was going to be our new housemate but didnt fancy living 30mins away from the West End. We begged every hostel and apartment block to let us stay back here but ended up back at the Ship saw a notice saying call Rhiannan for accommodation. I was a zombie, moaning, disappointed, and wanted to cry. But she led us to our new home!!!!! Middle of West End, 3 English girls – 2 from Surrey, 1 Welsh. 2 balconies, big bolts on front door, kitchen, a lift. We’re sharing a double bed and paying 280 each. Reeeeeesult, we can spoon every morning! We celebrated with real food and left the crisps behind because that is what we have been living on. Weds (George) – Started new job, quit new job. Yes, within 1 hour. Walking about in the heat pleading with people to pay 10 euros for a magasine with discounts in was a joke. Although we were very good and made 50 euros! Roy said the best anyone has ever made in an hour! But still, I hated it and we were too hot. After ringing Roy and telling him the bad news (he simply said we were ‘damn lazy’) we bumped into Jaya who tried to sell us club tickets (which we cannot afford right now, 50 quid!) got chatting and he said we could be Parade Girls for Es Paradis. Fully clothed, with signs and banners causing a riot in the club – right up our street. He then called us 30mins later and said he like our confidence (what confidence? we had just quit our first job!) – he said we could work the guestlist for the club too. Wicked. Saw Pompey Luke who recommended a club called the Underground which isn’t advertised and was free to get into on this night. We downed our Smirnikoff Vodka and turned up to a mansion. It wasn’t a club, it was really swanky and upmarket, really nice, VIP London style. Problem was it was full of Coke Heads and old geezers. We misheard the bar lady and paid 30 euros for a bottle of rose and not the 13 euros we thought. Downed it. Left. Came back to the delightful West End and created havoc in a club called Hush. Begged a closed chip shop for freezing cold old chips that were laying on the side. Molly actually had a frozen one then fell on the bed breaking my ipod speakers. Thurs (George) – Dragged ourselves to Jaya’s 12.00 meeting and discovered we were in the second round of interviews to do PR! Jammy. Loved it but we are too damn lazy as Roy told us yesterday. We told them we would start on Saturday and died on the beach all day. Pervert Pete wanted to whisk me away for drinks and food but I shouted some expletives across the beach and we got on with our tiring day of laying on the beach chatting to people and getting burnt. Topless is the norm! A lot of northerners here, most people are a bit older than us. We can definitely tell the workers from the holiday makers, mainly because we are all skint! But we’d rather be skint here than poor in Bromley! Beaches are beautiful if you walk 5 mins around the bay. 36 degrees! 6 euro for a meal but when we have our kitchen its supernoodles all the way! We’ve now decided to stay away from the clubs that the workers (LUKE) recommend and party with the holiday makers instead when its the free guestlist night for girls. Loads more stories, possibly ones that family shouldn’t hear!

Should we have a plan?

In less than 4 days my fellow hooligan and I will be causing carnage in Ibiza. We saw a program the other day called Sun, Sea and A&E – immediately we knowingly beamed at each other. We cannot go out and be normal, we are not normal girls. Molly ’slips her disc’ or rather her whore heels crack her back on the door frame. I’ve brought her home in a trolley, we’ve hung off ceiling poles and slipped on bars. We’ve been thrown out of clubs, barred, and pushed out of cabs. Bar sweeping is great as is conning food from strangers. Our third musketeer (Hip) is not on this particular adventure, neither are the other Never Forget girls and boys – all this means is that we will do vodka shots for them and have a riot in their name. In particular I will grudge into a kebab shop especially for Hip. I will explain grudging when it happens for the first time, most likely within the next 5 days. And just for Carla we will also talk men into giving us a few Euros for a ‘taxi’ home.

We have no real plan. We have flights booked. We’ve begged a random distant relative to collect us from the airport. We have a hostel booked for our first week but we have no Euros to pay with.  Smack bang in San Antonio’s West End!We have no jobs. We do have leads, promises from friends of friends that we can ’sell tickets’ for them. Tickets for what? But these jobs are commission based so who knows whether we will make enough Euros to pay our hostel. After the first week we have no home, that’s if we haven’t been lobbed out before the week is up. You might want to punch us and scream what the hell are you doing, but this is what we are excited for. We’re buzzing about the unknown, the what ifs, the oh my gods what now, the ahh crap I can’t believe that happened.

Our families have said if we don’t have jobs within the first few days we’re on the next flight home. Sod that! I’d rather lose all my belongings and sleep with the stray dogs on the beach. We could always sell the illuminous outfits we’ve packed for the clubs, that could bring in a few bob. But lets not tease ourselves with the clubs. We’ve agreed to restrain ourselves until we find jobs and scamble onto the workers guestlists. Although I can see us now, dumping our cases and legging it into the first overpriced superclub, getting trashed and wrecking any chance of a job. Perhaps we should just sell the Ibiza outfits now and not risk it. As if! It’s the risk we love!

We wanted to stay in Ibiza Rocks but it was too popular and fully booked, thank god. We would have splashed our cash on it and regretted it instantly. Ibiza Rocks can wait. We’ll get there! Just like we’ll be putting on a show in the clubs. There is no doubt about it, we are going and we are going to love it!

Ibiza Idea

The oldest ones all flippantly said well why the hell not? But it was the ones whose eyes lit up and almost squealed and started running on the spot who were the most excited for us. The girl who served us in Bluewater had eyes that simply said it all. She responded with a smooth wow girls that will be brilliant as she broke no routine in scanning the heels and opening the plastic bag but it was the eyes. They just grew wider and I could see the drunken antics stagger across them. It was the wow. The tone. Just ever so slightly did change from the monotonous rhythm of have a good day which scored customer service points. I could feel the excitement that she oozed for us in her imagination. Our oldest fans were too flippant. It was as if being cool was cool. Your young, you can do this while you’re young. I don’t see why we can’t do what we want to do even when we’re old. Naivety? Perhaps.

I Owe You

Dublin was light years ago and is shadowed by the brilliance of further 2009 adventures. Hip and I partied amongst Cologne’s Carnival. The University Boxers created havoc in Salou, Spain. We hen partied in Magaluf. The Waverley Roaders screamed our way through the Isle of Wight festival. The Sucre Babbies VIPed in Madrid. Again, the uni girls camped in Newquay and drank through Summerbreak. The Never Forget Girls sang with Take That at Wembley’s reunion. And the past week has been spent eating and exploring London; Greenwich Park, Portobello Road, Bond Street, Hanover Square, Gay Parade, St James’ Park, Sloane Square – making a change from the usual delights of Leicester Square, Holborn, Covent Garden and The Strand.

This is a promise to tell you about Cologne in Germany plus Salou, Magaluf and Madrid in Spain. Festivals, Summerbreak, Camping and London Discoveries are on my To Do List also but first and more excitingly is the next big travelbuzzing experience. IBIZA – 2 MONTHS – Molly - No Job – No Accomodation – No Hesitation

Dream Dublin, Ireland

The taxi pulled down the cobble streets of Temple Bar and we were greeted with a street party and an atmosphere of general chaos. It was fantastic. We quickly checked into our hostel – Oliver St John’s Gogarty and were totally delighted with what we were given. A modern crisp white room, 3 bunk beds and an en suite. What more could we ask for! Perfect. And with the location smack bang in the middle of what can only be described as party central, a huuuuge pub/restaurant ajoined, free tea and toast to nurse our hangovers with and AbraKEBABra directly opposite we just could not complain.

Heels , bags dumped and off we went. Irish pubs lined the streets and party goers danced the night away. Personally, I was shocked at how ‘Irish’ Ireland was – we were told to expect a commercial overpriced strip. Temple Bar was far from it, it was authentic, quaint and with the bands and smooth Irish bouncers we were whisked away.

The Temple Bar, Fitzsimons (where we spent New Year on the roof top terrace), Elephant & Castle, Gogartys are the very few place names I remember. Cider & blackcurrent coupled with rank white wine has contributed to slight memory loss – however, the Irish really aren’t big fans of rose wine which is something that got our goat. The bars only sold individual small bottles of the stuff which simply meant we had to down our white poison quicker and race with the pints of cider. Problem solved. The club 6 Dame Lane is a big recommendation if you want to get away from publand and dance in what we would call a real club – 1 minute from Temple Bar – dress to impress girls!

Our first full day was spent with our mate Harry Hangover wondering around the Guiness Storehouse. It’s just ten minutes walk from Temple Bar, 7 storeys high,  with a few bars, pour your own pint stations and a brilliant circular ‘Gravity Bar’ at the top which over looked the whole of Dublin. The atmosphere in this bar was buzzing but old Harry couldn’t handle the pace leaving only Claire and Dawn as the only girls who could finish their pints.

We clambered aboard a horse and carriage which showed us some more city sights including the river, cathedrals and city halls… Remembering back is slightly blurred but it is definitely a must-do. Wrap up warm and ride that horse through Dublin!

On New Year’s Day Dublin Castle was surprisingly closed but we enjoyed the fresh air and wondered around the beautiful grounds and garden. We found a gorgeous pub with a gorgeous barman (Molly fell in love) called the Hairy Lemon too, well worth a visit! We also staggered across the famous Japanese Karaoke Bar which was closed that night so we missed out on that, looked good from the outside! A pot of Irish Stew was also enjoyed and scoffed this day.

Dressing up in neon/fame for our last night on the cobbles we did Portsmouth proud. We screamed across Fitzsimons to the poor guy on the guitar who then thought we were Temple Bar’s first hen night of 2009, that was his biggest mistake as from then on the night was ours. We certainly put on a show. Later, back in the Hairy Lemon all 6 of us did our free vodka shots, chatted up the really old man Tom and squeezed into our favourite barmans tiny BM to wangle a lift to Copperface Jacks. 10 euros to get in and 11 euros for 2 smirnoff ice, we expected no less after 7 euros for our beloved cider. It was less showy than 6 Dame Lane or even Club Five in Fitsimons (5 floors, 5 DJs) but we still had a night to remember! 3 of the girls certainly got their Christmas kisses!

On our final day in Dublin we left our luggage in the hostel which I would prefer to almost call a hotel, and lazily strolled across the city. Dublin On Ice was crammed with kids and loud music which our delicate heads couldn’t handle so we opted for the mini big wheel – Becci was horrified as we spun the pod, we were all nearly sick! We walked past Jameson’s Whisky Distillary and whizz around the courtyard in a barrel on wheels, much to the managers dismay who gave us the daddy is disappointed face. The rest of the afternoon was spent in a beautiful Irish pub drinking yet more cider and dreaming up our next new year’s eve celebrations…. who knows what 2009 will bring.

For Hip and I our next stop is Cologne Carnival, Germany.

Oh and again, I’m still rubbish – facebook me for photos!

P.S

Ryanair – SORT OUT YOUR WEBSITE. If we cannot check in online why should we be mugged off paying checkin fees at the airports. Jeeeeeeez. Get rid of the ridiculous landing music too, the in your face yellow seats are enough to cope with.

6 Girls, 3 Nights, NYE & DUBLIN

3 months after hip and I’s return from Oz the time has come for another adventure… this time the girls are coming.

With semester 1 nearly done we are emerging from the vodka haze in Portsmouth to pack our bags and head over to Ireland. Yes, we are staying in a hostel – The Oliver St. John Gogarty`s Hostel. As poor poor poor students we have no choice but we are reassured that the hostel is OK especially as there is a bar in the building. And the location is spot on.

Temple Bar seems to be the place to be in Dubbers, although many people have warned us of over priced drinks. Seeing as drinking is what we do best, it’s a good job we’ve saved enough Euros by staying in The Oliver. 

A few things in the pipeline so far – a visit to the Guiness Factory, an open top bus ride, a neon themed dress up. If any of you fellow sta travelbuzzers have any hints and tips for us which we’re open to explore with you, let me know! 

For now, the hoodys never got ordered and the plans never confirmed - but one thing is for certain; we’ll be singing Auld Lang Syne at the top of our voices and drinking to 2009 with real Irish style.
 

STA Travelling Photos…

Skydiving onto Mission Beach

 

If you want to see photos of the Australian Adventurers just add me on facebook and take a look, anything in particular that you want to see, just ask!